Don't get caught in the mind trap that you have done something so hideous that God could never forgive you for. Take a look at Romans 5:20--KJV--But where sin abounded, grace did much more abound. That means that no matter how big a sin you've committed, God's grace is bigger.
Paul wrote the letter to the Romans. He was a scoundrel before Jesus got a hold of him. He put people in prison, broke up homes and even consented to putting Christians to death. That's bad stuff.
But, when Paul met Jesus on the road to Damascus, Jesus never said anything about what he had done. Instead Jesus told Paul to send for a man named Ananias to pray for him. Paul's past was a mute point.
Why? God said through Isaiah, in Isaiah 43:25--I am He who blots out your transgressions for My sake, and I will not remember your sins. That's what God said in the Old Testament and that's what Jesus practiced. All through the New Testament you find Jesus talking to believers as if they had never done anything wrong. Why? Because He chooses NOT to remember your sins. Your sins are in your past and God is concerned about your future.
Why not trust Jesus today? Start by asking Jesus to forgive you of your sins. Ask Him to come into your heart. Tell Him you want to know more about Him and you want to know more about His love. Start reading the Bible. Find someone you know that is a believer. Go to church with them. And never forget.....God's grace is greater than Your Sin.
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